Saturday, 31 May

Herr Zeible:

What is this constant obsession we have with outdated modes of transport? Shouldn't people be satisfied to stay where they are? What is wrong with that place we all call "home?" In this day and age there should be enough there to keep one rooted. Actually, I live for the day when virtual access becomes the norm and I may visit the track, place a bet and smell the horses all from the comfort of my converted billiard room.

But I did love a good cigar, did I not? Stogidoro was my brand. Five dollars a piece they were -- and this when a loaf of bread cost less than a gallon of gas -- and that was when gasoline cost less than bottle water -- if you could find bottled water. Cigars seem to have made a comeback (a mobile humidor truck came down the lane today ringing its bell. Oh how the children ran to the sound!) -- too late for me I am afraid, what with the cancered larynx &c. I am told by my physician that my little buzzy voice box will soon be a thing of the past. No more will I have to touch it when I wish to speak. Instead, electrodes embedded in my cerebral cortex will activate it and, rather than that annoying mechanical oralization, a soothing voice of a famous orator of my choosing will emanate from stereo speakers implanted in my arm pits! Won't that be a refreshing for those around me?

I have been in contact with El Supremo, the Mystic Matador and he has agreed to entertain at your niece's upcoming sixth birthday gathering. One suggestion: do not let him near the wine cellar or his performance will become slightly more "adult" than would probably be proper.

Have faith in little things,

Msgr. Terence Flynn

Letter the Current