Wednesday, 24 June

Garble:

Please pardon the delay in my responding to your explanation of the delay in responding to my response previous. Some while ago, I found myself in receipt of a yellowed œnvelope containing a yellowed sheet of foolscap, informing me that at some meeting long past, I had been appointed President of the Procrastinator's Society. A member in good standing, I had never arrived at the meetings in time to receive such bulletins in person; I suppose that is why they thought me of sufficient honor to bear such responsibility.

The President of any prestigious organization must be a paragon of the virtues expounded by said organization, and I determined to be no exception. However, I soon found that a life of total procrastination to be, to put it mildly, inconvenient. Putting off meals? Nay, a task for larger men than I. I had put aside replying to your letter, while trying to find a way of resigning my post without embarrassing myself before my peers (I certainly could not attend a meeting now, and even bringing up the subject I feared would mark me blackly as a "go-getter"), when I hit upon the obvious, and in grand fashion am currently engaged in delaying assuming the duties of President until I have more free time.

Yours,

P. Doughboy

PS - Luther is your man? Then whatever happened to that other fellow? Does he work for me now?

Letter the Current